Thursday, April 15, 2010

Devil's Sex Cake

For the background on the name of this cake, read What IS the Devil's Favorite Food, Anyway?!

This is one of the easiest cakes to make, and it really is sinfully delicious; 
Everyone who gets a piece is satisfied.


1 devils food cake mix (or German chocolate, if you prefer)
(ingredients referred to on the cake box: oil and egg)
1 large container of Cool-Whip (the small is pictured, but I wished I had had a little more)
1 bag of Heath bits (or 4-5 Heath bars, chopped small)

 First, bake the cake per directions on the box.

As soon as you take the cake out, use the handle of a wooden spoon to poke holes in a regular pattern all over the cake. Do NOT poke the holes all the way down to the bottom; just do it half-way. (But remember, you can still get pregnant going half-way.)

Put the caramel topping in the microwave (without the lid) and microwave long enough to heat it up for pouring (about a minute at half-power, depending on your microwave). Stir. Pour over the cake, taking care to fill the holes as evenly as possible.

Allow cake to cool.

When the cake is cooled, spread the Cool-Whip over the top. 

Sprinkle Heath bits over the Cool-Whip. 

Chill, smoke a cigarette, and then go clean up.

It was good for me. Hope it's good for you, too.

Monday, April 12, 2010

Snickers Bar "Salad"

Who am I kidding? It's a dessert. And seriously; it's so easy, a whole post about it would be ridiculous.

And it's so quick, I forgot to take a photo of the ingredients:

6 Snickers bars, chopped
1 big container of Cool-Whip
6 large granny smith apples, cored and sliced

This is all I've got for you (just before the big stir!)

And it's so good, I have no photos of the leftovers.

Really; it's that good.

And tune in next time for the promised "Devil's Sex Cake!"

Saturday, April 10, 2010

Apple Dumplings, Simple and Delicious

If you've never had The Pioneer Woman's Apple Dumplings before, you are really missing out! They're one of the easiest things to make (Yes, Matty, even for you.) I've been making them for years, as they are the favorite of everyone in my house and beyond, and to prove it, I'll tell you that Kendall requested Apple Dumplings for her "birthday cake" when she had her birthday sleepover tonight. (That reminds me--while they're in the oven, I'd better find some candles!!)


2 sticks of butter
1 1/2 cups sugar
1 tsp vanilla
2 granny-smith apples
2 pkgs Pillsbury Crescent Rolls
cinnamon (enough to sprinkle as pictured below)
a few ounces of Mountain Dew soda/pop

(As you may have noticed, this recipe is not for the calorie/fat conscious. If you must be health conscious, simply close your eyes while you eat it; I've heard that cuts the calories and fat in half!)

Ready? First, put the two sticks of butter in a 2-quart saucepan to melt on low. While it's melting, cut and peel the apples however you like to do it. I use the fun apple cutter...

but I suppose it would have been easier to simply peel the apple and then cut it. It's a horse-apiece, I guess.

There are eight dinner rolls per package. Sixteen dumplings fit nicely in a cake pan (two per person.) The apples I bought today were very small, so I used about a slice and a half for each one. Simply set them at the wide end, roll them up, and place the apple-filled crescents in your cake pan.

By the time you've finished, the butter should be melted.

Add the sugar, and stir, but not too much; it should still be grainy. Remove from heat and add the vanilla (Or not; I've accidentally left it out before, and it turned out fine.)

Pour butter/sugar mixture evenly over all.

Sprinkle with cinnamon.

Now for the odd part. Carefully pour some Mountain Dew down the rows and around the edges.

I would guess that you only need about 1/4 cup. If you use too much, they'll be swimming in liquid. When that happens, I just take a turkey baster and suck some of the juice out, so that they don't get too soggy.

[BTW, if you're especially observant, you will wonder why in the world these apples are now in a ceramic pan, instead of metal. (If you did notice, I'm very impressed!!) The reason is that I made two pans worth for Kendall's party, since I had to feed 14 girls.]

Bake 35-40 minutes at 350 degrees, or until they are nice and brown and you are drooling.

Remove from oven and let stand for a minute or two, or you won't be able to use your tongue for a few days (which might be good, what with the week's worth of calories and fat you'll be consuming.) Serve with or without vanilla ice cream.

Here's the birthday girl enjoying her "cake."

For the record, the girls loved the apple dumplings. In fact, one of them inspired a new name for them, when she asked, "May I have another piece of heaven, please?"

Need I say more?